The Galleria Fortress
Karen the Warlord
Embracing the name. Pre-Event: PTA president, HOA board member, holder of many opinions. When society collapsed, she simply... transferred her organizational skills to militia management. Runs the mall with the efficiency of someone who once got a Starbucks employee fired over foam consistency. House rules are laminated and numbered. Violations result in 'managerial discussions.' Has a suggestion box. Nobody uses it. She checks it daily anyway. Messages guests with reservation details, check-in instructions, and a PDF of expectations. Read the PDF. Seriously. She'll quiz you.
Karen didn't just survive the apocalypse. She THRIVED. This former regional shopping mall is now the most organized fortress in the wasteland.
The Apple Store is her personal quarters (glass walls intact, somehow). The food court is a fully operational mess hall. Hot Topic is the armory. Spencer's is... we don't talk about Spencer's.
Strict house rules enforced: Shoes required. Shirts required. Attitude adjustment required. She WILL ask to speak to your previous host if there are issues.
The fountain still works. Nobody knows how. Karen knows. Karen isn't telling.
Fun fact: The mall walkers never stopped. There are elderly survivors who do laps every morning at 6 AM. They predate the apocalypse. They might predate the mall.
I joined the mall walkers. They do laps at 6 AM. They've been doing this since before The Event. They might have been doing it since before the MALL. They don't speak. They just walk. In formation. I tried to walk faster. They matched my pace. I slowed down. They slowed down. We are one now.
Read the PDF. I cannot stress this enough. READ THE PDF. I didn't read the PDF. Karen quizzed me at check-in. I failed. The 'managerial discussion' lasted 90 minutes. I now have the PDF memorized. I recite it in my sleep. The Galleria is immaculate. Karen is terrifying. Five stars.
Wandered into Spencer's by accident. Karen said 'we don't talk about Spencer's.' Now I understand why. I will never talk about Spencer's. Put something in the suggestion box about it. She read it. Called a meeting. About the suggestion box. The suggestion box is for POSITIVE suggestions only, apparently.
Charges applied upon nuclear event confirmation.